Depression 10: Crisis Stabilization Unit

The Crisis Stabilization Unit (CSU) offered a level of help and had certain safety procedures different than anything I had experienced before, but I wasn’t embarrassed by that. I was thankful there was a place like this I could go to, and I knew I needed to be there. The CSU was a very helpful place for me to stay at for a few days.

When I arrived at the CSU in the evening, I shared my story and answered questions for the fourth time that day. The psych nurse said he was sorry I had to say it all again, but I wasn’t bothered by that. I had hidden so much of my experience and pain for eight years now, so it was actually a relief to start talking. Each time I shared my story that day, it got a little easier to talk about what I had been experiencing and feeling and the things I had done to deal with my pain.

At the end of the initial meeting with the psych nurse, the nurse looked through my things and also took my medication into his care. I was then required to shower, and my clothes had to be put in the dryer for bedbug prevention. I wore some hospital-like clothes until my clothes were ready. I quietly ate dinner and then went to my room. I didn’t sleep well that night, but that was normal and wasn’t because of the place I was in. I knew the CSU was a good place for me to be.

We each had our own room and there were also large windows, couches and a TV, and a couple tables near puzzles and colouring sheets. Activities like these were available but not scheduled. Having almost no obligations for the day and a slow pace aided the beginning of crisis recovery. During my stay, I wove seven bracelets, going to the staff office each time I needed scissors; scissors weren’t kept in the client areas. The food prepared for us was good and it was served to us. Some clients mostly stayed in their rooms while others, like me, found the company of other clients helpful. The CSU was quiet and calm.

Every day, each of us would have two meetings with one of the crisis workers to talk about how we were doing and to discuss resources and strategies for getting through our crises. Every hour, during the day and night, one of the staff members would perform the hourly check, checking on each of us and marking they had done so on their clipboard. Short breaks when we could go outside and visiting hours were scheduled at certain times of the day. In the mornings, I waited outside the nurse’s office for my medication, with other clients waiting beside me. After being at the CSU for 24 hours, clients could request to go out on pass for visiting people or for activities. The structure and atmosphere were well-suited to a crisis stabilization unit.

A couple years ago, I wouldn’t have imagined that I would need to be in a place that had hourly checks, lineups for medication, and locked up scissors, but I wasn’t embarrassed by that. I didn’t struggle with feeling like I didn’t belong there or thinking this type of place put a label on me I didn’t want to have. By the time I was there, I knew I needed to be there and was thankful for the quiet atmosphere, slow-paced days, and support of the crisis workers.

Kristen